I Shall Be Released...



"I've seen my light come shining...
from the west down to the east.

Any day now...
any day now...
I shall be released."



For almost 4 years, I've been carrying someone else's debt... almost $50K worth (not exactly small potatoes). In uncertain financial status myself during a lot of that time, I had no way to escape from the delinquent tax collection letters and threats from the mortgage holder. My only legal recourse would have been to strike out at this person, but my heart could not take me there. And then God whispered another plan to me. He said... "Give this to me. I will take care of you."

There were many days that the doubt crept in, and I fretted over what would happen. I worried about the asset being seized and foreclosed upon... about my strong credit that I had carefully built and was trying to hold on to... about shame and failure. But eventually, I would worry myself into a tearful bundle of nerves, hitting my knees to pray, and I would hear His whisper of assurance that I would be released.

It was so hard to let go and trust God, but I did. And... in God's time... almost 4 years later, I was released this past week. Released from financial liability and peril that I did not earn or deserve. Released from worry. Released from fear.

Sometimes it seems like the only way out is one that builds on anger and resentment. Sometimes what is "wrong seems oft so strong," and it feels like God isn't listening. The promise is not that we will be released in our lifetime, but we WILL be released. I think the true battle was not one of an unpaid debt or financial peril, but it was the battle within me to turn the other cheek when the world was telling me to strike back. By trusting God and being guided by my faith instead of my sense of the timing of justice, I was released from something much greater...

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